Welcome to Episode 37!
This week’s episode is about commitment and context.
I wrote an article for Together Magazine this week that we’re posting up at the same time as we’re posting this interview. It’s called You And Me And Everyone We Know, and it’s about the importance of community in a marriage. It’s my view that marriage cannot exist without community, that marriage is a construct by community and of community–that the two are inextricably intertwined, and this this is a strength. You can find that article on our webpage: http://together.guide/magazine/
I mention this not only because I hope you’ll read the article, but because today’s episode with Scott and Kelly is about this very issue. At the beginning of the interview, as you’ll hear, Kelly tells us that marriage is about commitment, and that commitment means sticking it out when it’s sticking it to you–and that’s probably true; that view comes from her experience as a divorce lawyer in LA. But her insight goes much deeper than that. These two had an extremely rocky start as you’ll hear, and what turned things around was their focus on a new paradigm–a whole new context that did more than just make them happy, it allowed family blossom.
You can find Kelly’s family law practice at http://www.purposedrivenlawyers.com/. She has offices in Pasadena, Los Angeles, San Diego, and San Francisco.
If you like what we’re up to here at together, please consider supporting our crowdfunding campaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’re just getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thank you!
Welcome to Episode 36!
Today’s episode is part two of an interview with Kelli and Timothy Lamb. If you haven’t heard part one, you should probably go back and listen to that, because this episode will make a lot more sense if you do.
There’s a lot going on in this episode, but there are two themes that struck me as particularly interesting. I’m curious to hear what you think of these, so let me know your thoughts on our facebook page: www.facebook.com/togethershow.
The first theme is Kelli’s ability to live life on her terms. We’ve had other couples on the show talk about living outside the box (KT and Doug and JenJen and Noah are two very notable example), but never a couple that appears so classically mainstream. But the truth is of course that none of us is “normal” in any real sense - we’re all outside the standard in one way or another. The lesson from Kelli and Timothy is to embrace that difference.
The second theme is the persistence with which Kelli and Tim consistently work their way towards an understanding of what the other needs. It’s lovely to watch that unfold.
I’d love to know what you got from the episode, so let me know and I’ll read your comments on a future show. You can email me at host@together.guide
We posted two articles at Together Magazine this week that fit nicely with the themes in these episodes. The first is called Uncovering Your Expectations, and it’s about Understanding and Sharing what you really want in a relationship before resentment sets in. The second is called Want The One You’re With, and it’s packed full of extraordinarily solid insights into keeping the passion burning in a long term relationship. You can find those at our website: www.together.guide/magazine,
You can find more about Kelli on her Instagram Feed @Kellilamb_ or at RueMag.com, where she is managing editor.
Timothy’s Instagram is:@TimmyLamb - and he is the Art Director and the Character Designer for Trolls, the forthcoming animated feature from DreamWorks Animation.
If you like what we’re up to here at together, please consider supporting our crowdfunding campaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’re just getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thank you!
Welcome to Episode 35!
I realized while reflecting on the show this week, that other than my very brief show-opener that you probably hear each episode - the one about my having been a divorce lawyer, I’ve never fully explained why I’m producing Together - the podcast or the magazine.
And in some sense, there's really only one answer, and that’s that I love this project more than anything I’ve ever done.
But I do have a humble agenda that I may as well confess: and that is simply to help us all let go of some measure of shame, by uncovering stories about what it means to be a real person with real challenges.
In this particular era of social media, where our feeds are perfectly manicured to showcase our most clever and most happy selves, it can be easy to feel like something is wrong when the normal challenges of being human, and being in a relationship begin to arise. Our show hopes to be an antidote to that shame, and remind us that it’s perfectly okay to be real person with real challenges - all that means about you is that you’re a real person, with real challenges.
And that brings me to our couple for the week - Kelli and Timothy Lamb.
Now this is a very sweet story about true love, yes I actually mean that - and about the realities of living together day by day in the midst of love. And those two things are not mutually exclusive. We can both be in love and face hard times with one another.
What makes this story fascinating - as always with our guests - is the willingness of Kelli and Tim to be fully transparent about the challenges.
And this is particularly the case because both Kelli and Tim are fairly well known. Kelly is the managing editor and the social media face of Rue Magazine, and Timothy is an Art Director at Dreamworks Animation - he was the character designer for the forthcoming Trolls movies, which is out this November.
Some might say that speaking openly about the hard times could fly in the face of a perfectly manicured social media feed. I say not so - truth only adds depth. Depth creates value. And Kelli and Tim have both in spades.
So with that, let’s go to part 1 of our interview with Kelli and Timothy Lamb.
You can find more about Kelli on her Instagram Feed @Kellilamb_ or at RueMag.com, where she is managing editor.
Timothy’s Instagram is:@TimmyLamb - and he is the Art Director and the Character Designer for Trolls, the forthcoming animated feature from DreamWorks Animation.
If you like what we’re up to here at together, please consider supporting our crowdfunding campaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’re just getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thank you!
Welcome to Episode 34!
Today’s show is part two of an interview with my two absolute favorite artists, the supremely talented Joshua Hagler, and Maja Ruznic. If you haven’t heard Tuesday’s episode, you should probably do that, because it will give you some more context for what’s going on today.
In this episode, Josh and Maja take us a little deeper into their challenges around money and how that impacts their relationship, and they also make some very interesting strides towards resolving the issues.
We also posted an article about trust and fear in our online magazine today, and it dovetails nicely with this episode. It’s called The Spiral Of Trust, and you can find it at our website: www.together.guide/magazine.
You can find more about Josh and Maja at their websites. Josh’s website is: http://joshuahagler.com, and Maja’s website is http://www.ontheedgeofreason.com/.
If you like what we’re up to here at together, please consider supporting our crowdfunding campaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’re just getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thank you!
Welcome to Episode 33!
Today’s show is part one of a two part interview with two extraordinary artists: Joshua Hagler, and Maja Ruznic. I’m a huge fan of these two professionally, so it was a real privilege to get a look inside their personal lives. This was a very long interview, so I’ve clipped out several sections that we’ll be releasing as bonus clips for patreon subscribers (you can find more about our patreon campaign at patreon at patreon.com/together).
What we left in was, frankly, the segments about their challenges. These two are a very successful and very happy couple, but they do have one consistent challenge, and that’s money. It will come as no surprise to you that being a successful artist doesn’t always mean financial security. And that fact has a serious impact on artists all over the world - and their personal lives. These two have been courageous enough to drop the veil for a time, and to be honest with us about how money impacts their lives and careers.
You can find more about Josh and Maja at their websites. Josh’s website is: http://joshuahagler.com, and Maja’s website is http://www.ontheedgeofreason.com/.
If you like what we’re up to here at together, please consider supporting our crowdfunding campaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’re just getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thank you!
Welcome to Episode 32!
Today’s episode is part two of an in interview with KT Nelson and Doug Winter. If you haven’t listened to part 1, you might want to go back and do that, because it will give you some more context for what’s going on today. That said, today’s show really does by itself.
Today we explore questions of infidelity and sexual power dynamics.
If you would like to learn more about KT Nelson, you can find her at the ODC Dance Website.
If you would like to support what we’re doing at Together, please don’t be shy about leaving us a review on iTunes - reviews help us to reach more listeners on iTunes, so we very much appreciate it. If you would like to support us financially, you can find our crowdfunding campaign at www.patreon.com/together.
Today’s episode is part 1 of a two-part interview about a couple that’s still flirting with each other after more than 40 years. This isn’t to say that they or everything they have done has done been perfect. In fact, these two have been through more life - the ups and downs - than anyone has a right to expect! It’s more that by choosing to break the mold of certain social conventions, they were able to craft a relationship they actually wanted to be in - and whether they were entirely aware of what they were doing at the time or not, what they created is still working today.
Part one of this interview is about of breaking a social mold, and how to build a life together afterwards. And in Part two, which we release on Thursday, we explore the question of what infidelity really is, anyway, and the ins and outs of a sexual power dynamic.
You can learn more about KT Nelson at the ODC Dance Website.
If you would like to support what we’re doing at Together, please don’t be shy about leaving us a review on iTunes - reviews help us to reach more listeners on iTunes, so we very much appreciate it. If you would like to support us financiall, you can find our crowdfunding campaign at www.patreon.com/together.
Welcome to Episode 30!
Today’s episode is part 2 of an interview about the struggles inherent to trust and communication, and which are made more challenging by non-monogamy. If you haven’t heard Tuesday’s episode, you should probably go back and listen to that, because it will give you some more context for what’s going on today.
To recap, on Tuesday, Esther and Chris shared how and why they became non-monogamous in the first place, and some of their concerns about how it’s going so far.
In today’s episode they share with us the details about a challenge they’re currently facing, and that remains unresolved. It takes a lot of courage for these two to be as open with us as they are, so thank you Esther and Chris, thank you.
If you like what we’re up to here at together, please consider supporting our crowdfunding campaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’re just getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thank you!
Welcome to Episode 29!
This week we’re presenting a twopart interview about challenges that are inherent to all romanticrelationships, but which in this case are made more apparent bynon-monogamy.
There is no tidy resolution tothis story. These two are very much in the midst of a dispute, andwe’re going to a first hand view of what it’s like to be in themiddle of a potentially critical challenge, without all the rightsanswers that come from hindsight.
But these two are committed tosomething that they think is important, and as a result they’rewilling both to share their challenges with us, and to continueworking it out with each other.
As a listener, you willinevitably have your judgments about the couple in this interview,but as I have said before on these shows, I invite you to suspendyour judgment for the time. Rather allow what these two areexperiencing to represent for you the challenges that we all facewith our partners. Relationships are hard, no matter theconfiguration. Intimacy and honesty are intimidating, no matteryour partner. We all fall down despite our best intentions, and yetwe carry on.
Enjoy the show!
If you like what we’re up tohere at together, please consider supporting our crowdfundingcampaign at patreon.com/together - we’re on a mission to crush shame, and we’rejust getting off the ground, so every penny helps. Thankyou!